Monthly Archives: July 2002

Burdens

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So I finally finished summer school today. It feels like this huge burden has been lifted from my shoulders. The classes were tough, but I feel like I did well. I know I got one A, and I think the other two are B’s, so that’s awesome.

I’m so thankful to have a God above that cares about me and loves me as only He can – I really felt His hand on me today, helping me with finals, helping me to carry on.

Tonight my wife and I got really sad, thinking about Virginia. We’d lived out there for a year, and we loved everything about the area except that it was far away. We go back and forth on the issue – some days, we wish we were back in VA, some days we’re glad to be close to family.

It’s a really hard call to make – what happiness is more fulfilling, that of being in an area you like versus being near family you love. For me, the decision is pretty much VA, except that my wife really loves being near the family – it’s a hard call. I want her to be happy, because I can be happy most places, but we were both really happy out there.

Oh well, we’ve got some time to think about it.

Comforting Thoughts

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I just finished this ‘volume’ – a two-books-in-one large 800+ page book with two novels in it. One was entitled This Present Darkness and the other was Piercing The Darkness.

Both books have, in rather vivid detail, descriptions of the Host of Heaven, God’s Angelic Warriors, battling it out with some of the worst demons that Satan can throw their way (worst in multiple ways).

At points, it seemed as though the Host of Heaven was going to be defeated, but the prayers of the Saints in and around the towns were what helped to energize the Host to win the fight.

After reading those two books, a calming, comforting thought came upon me, something that was touched upon in the books but not so heavily emphasized.

It’s a comfort to me to know that, no matter what happens, the Lord has already won it all. Christ defeated sin and death, and through that, the war is won. There may be battles along the way, but it’s all laid out and will happen in God’s time.

I’m hoping it makes for some pleasant dreams, as my sleep will be rather short tonight. Gotta get up in five hours to go to school.

Sick Day

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I stayed home sick today – sick is no fun. Had a headache, upset stomach, etc.

On the plus side, I made some tweaks to the mother ship, such as adding a Google search bar, so that I can set it to my homepage. I like to use my home to search, and now I can look at RandomThink.net and search from my home – fun fun.

I’ve also been ripping a lot of CDs to MP3 format. I have a Rio Volt SP250 MP3 CD player, but I’ve only had one CD full of MP3s to listen to, so now I’m taking most all of my CDs and ripping onto my HD, so that I can turn them into CDs whenever I feel like it.

Gonna go now, time to rest.

Some Resolve

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I just got home from a function of the LDS church – a Stake Priesthood meeting.

Basically, all of the guys from the church (just guys) who have the priesthood (which most do, for more explanation their website should have details) go and listen to people who are high up in the ranks for the state come and talk about ongoings, motivate each other to do good works, etc.

My friend invited me to this – it was odd, because I was thinking of calling him shortly after my last post, then he called me and invited me.

I’m all dressed the part now, and after going, it felt good. These guys have real conviction in their hearts.

I’ve got a lot of praying and thinking to do, but after tonight, things feel a lot better.

Struggles

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I find myself stuck in a really rough spot.

Currently, the situation stands that I am a Christian. I am firm in my belief, and think that it would take quite a bit to sway me from that. I’m open to listen to opinions, but ask that those who have opinions listen fairly to my side of the story.

Lately, my wife and I have been trying to find a church, but not with much success in some ways. We’ve gone to the church my wife used to go to, and the people there are great, truly great. Some of the nicest people I’ve ever met.

This church is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, also commonly known as the Mormons, or the LDS church to it’s members.

I feel that the church has the basics right – the belief that Christ is the son of God, sent to cleanse us of our sins, and that the only way back is through him – no real problems there.

However, I hear a bunch of other odd things from people outside of the church who claim that the church is a cult, and that there are quite a few things not quite right with it.

I’ve been investigating things for awhile now, and I feel like, for the most part, the church has things right.

One of my biggest differing points is in regards to the book of Revelation, and whether or not to take it as prophetic, a record of history, or a mix.

I’ve always thought of it as prophetic, that someday (soon) Jesus will return, take his true followers, and sometime around that event the world will enter the last seven years before Jesus returns and sets up the Millenial Kingdom.

The content I’ve read about the LDS stance on things is a mix – that of the seven seals, we’re currently living in the sixth seal.

It does mention that Christ is to return and set up his kingdom, but nothing about a rapture beforehand, which leads me to believe that the LDS stance is that things will just get worse and worse, and at Christ’s second coming he’ll take over and fix things.

If you ask me, either way, it gets to the same endpoint, but the path traveled there is different.

There also seem to be some side doctrinal differences, things that I may have done slightly differently, or have lived by anyways (no coffee, etc).

What I wonder is this: What makes a church right? Is it just having the basics down? Will I ever find a church that meets everything I believe in?

I flop back and forth on the issue – I have some Christian friends who feel that the LDS church is just plain wrong, I have some other Christian friends who feel that, so long as the foundation on Christ is there, it’s okay.

I doubt I’ll ever find a church that fits with everything I believe, short of creating my own church, but then I’m just adding to the chaos and confusion, and I don’t feel my calling is to create another Christian church out there.

I have no question that the LDS church is Christian in basis, I just don’t know how the side points may affect my salvation.

Upon thinking this, I then realize that my salvation is truly just a point of interaction between me and my Creator, and nobody else. The church is there as a supportive mechanism, to help me along the right way.

I guess my worries are somewhat unfounded, and that no matter what church I go to, I’ll have conflicts – I don’t know what’s holding me back, but something is, and I just can’t put my finger on it yet.

This is a very personal thing, but it’s something that weighs heavily on me, and I want a solid answer to, so I just keep praying and hoping to know.

First thoughts

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So this is my personal journal, my new place to live. I’ve got lots to post, as I think about a lot of things. heh.

I’m excited about RandomThink.net – seems like a great thing. I’ve got some friends excited too, I’m really hoping the site grows and becomes popular.

Let the thoughts begin.